Saturday, February 13, 2010

settling down.... and adoption stuff

Things are finally settling down a little at work. I still don't trust or particularly like or want to speak to the one who suffered the loss, but the other one and I finally got a chance to talk about things... Of course she didn't realize how she had hurt me, didn't realize she had talked about it right in front of me, and said that she didn't care what the other one thought, she would tell me as soon as she found out the next time the other one was expecting. It really is so much easier to work with someone when you're not holding all this hurt in, when you can forgive and move on.
On the adoption front, several things. First, the bad, then we'll end with the good. Hubby goes Monday for a glu*cose test. Dia*betes might limit us as far as international adoption. For the past few days, I have had swollen, painful hands. Rhe*umati0d ar*thrit!s runs in my mom's side of the family. My mom also has lu*pus. Yeah, I'm thinking either of those would limit us even more. I don't really have time to go to the doctor for myself when I'm going with hubby to take care of his medical issues, but I also don't really WANT to know what's going on with me just yet.
Now for the good... I was reading on a private blog about how loving others simply doesn't come naturally. Especially when that person is completely, totally different from us. I can't say I relate... God has gifted me that heart that cares for orphans, that is willing to pick up that dirty, worthless-to-the-world child. I would be among the first to run to that child, pick him up, and hug him. We can clean her up later, but for now, let's just love and feed and hold. It just comes naturally to me. I thought it wasn't anything special, but maybe it is.

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