Thursday, May 29, 2008

Sister-in-law offered hubby and I some pizza for supper. She had her 2 nieces spending the night. So hubby and I went over to get the pizza and play with the 3 little girls and youngest nephew. We drank poisoned tea, we died, and we were tickled back to life... S-I-L practically threw the baby @ me when I got to the door, which, of course, resulted in him crying, but a few minutes later, we were sitting in the floor, mommy could leave the room, and he was showing me his mad new crawling skills.... And laughing at my silly games and faces and sounds and teaching him to roll a ball was quite funny, too. Then switch, I was playing with the little girls and hubby had the baby. S-I-L does NOT rough-house with them, that is HER hubby's thing, he was at a baseball game, so it was MY hubb'ys job, the girls decided, to be their jungle gym. A rather melancholy feeling, all that giggling and jumping on the bed and poisoned tea... I knew we were coming back to an empty house, where I was get online and hubby woudl play the play....station. I knew that by the time we DO acquire our children, they will have no silly little cousins their age to play with and be silly with. All of our kids' cousins will be at that age where it's so totally NOT cool to play/share with a baby/toddler. Sigh.... I thought I was back.... Those baby steps I was talking about before our weekend get-away? Yeah, they're more like baby-oh-well-I-gave-it-my-all-and-it-wasn't-even-half-a-step, steps. Some laundry is washed and dried, and that is the extent of my house work for the week. It's not folded or put away. Most of our non-clothing-trip-stuff is still sitting in the living room or bedroom floor. No hope for the weekend housework, too much going on!! Oh well, maybe next week! After sleeping for 12 hours Tuesday night, last night I was up until 6 am (yes AM, as in it was daylight when I went to bed!), slept for 3 hours, and went to work. So tonight, I've done next to nothing.
So where am I? Somewhere between I'm-going-to-be-productive-during-my-season-of-no-kids, and that-big-mess-will-still-be-there-tomorrow-so-screw-it-all-give-me-some-chocolate!!
I did NOT purchase the OPK today.. Partially because, once again, I'm about to turn in my SECOND mileage of the month, and haven't received the FIRST check (life just got in the way again, I guess.... Too bad I'm almost out of gas, which I need to make those deliveries!)Anyway. Also, I just really didn't want to. Call it lazy, call it taking a break, call it depressed, call it whatever you want, I just don't feel like messing with it this month. (TMI on the way!!) Anyway, it's a heckuva lot more fun when you're not having to time things just so, you know? Argh. I should not be so jaded one year into marriage.... Nor should I be so far into this whole infertility thing.... We should be just now going "Hhmmm, there just might be a problem," instead of this crappy place. Grrrrr I hate myself when I get like this.
On a happier note, I had a friend ask me if anyone had ever told me I should become a writer because I'm so well-spoken. (Yes, quite often..... And this one time, I was given a free week of summer camp because a director was so impressed by a letter I wrote... And I was about 10 or 12 then, no abuse and no infertility to write about yet) Ha!!!! AND..... Tomorrow night I get to go to my fav Italian place for hubby's aunt's surprise retirement party. Pasta Bake here I come!!! AND.... They have this awesome thing called a "chocolate potato," which is vanilla bean ice cream rolled in cocoa and chocolate drizzled on top..... Perfect time for a chocolate craving!!!!

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